Release

In dance, it is always best to release your judgment about how it’s going to look.  We can worry about how a movement “fits” our bodies, but that takes away the joy and replaces it with anxiety.  To me, the purpose of dance is to find the joy and personal expression in movement to music. 

Your expression is never wrong.  You can judge it if you want to and there’s nothing wrong with honing your skills, but connection to yourself and feeling your joy is really paramount.  Dance can be a celebration and it can also be a release if you are going through a difficult time.  You can find your way back to yourself by using dance as a party or as a meditation or both at the same time.  

In my meditation practice, I often switch gears.  If one way “in” isn’t working for me on one day, I go to another method.  What I have learned is that there are many ways to find the infinite that is within each of us.  We all have different ways of getting in touch with that inner space.  

The truth is we are always connected to our true selves.  There is no other way for us to be.  All That Is, is just that – All.  There is nothing and no one that can be separate from that.  

In meditation and in movement there is only your own way.  You can’t be wrong in the expression of yourself.  Everyone has a road “in” that is unique.  

Meditation, using stillness or motion, helps us to become more conscious of what is within. 

We can search and chase what we believe to be spiritual.  We can try really hard.  But we don’t really have to try, we only have to be exactly who we are.  We can release all the striving.   We can choose to let go of all notions of what should be, releasing the judgment of right or wrong.  Release is trusting that you are always a part of the One  –  even if you can’t perceive it.

You are always connected, all the time.  In other words, All That Is can’t lose your file.   

So instead of reaching, try releasing.

You already are what you seek to be.  You might just not be aware of it yet. 

 

Halo

I have been teaching a new choreography to the song, Halo, by Beyonce.  In the dance, there is a place where you are facing right, your left foot crosses over, and you turn or unwind.  There is a long four-count in which to achieve this – and it’s easy.  

Because there is so much time, it’s fun to try and turn more than once.  In order to do that, you have to spot – find a spot to look at for as long as you are facing that way and then whip your head around to find that spot again.  Your body will follow your gaze.  You also need a strong core.  Both of these will create a more controlled turn that keeps you from getting dizzy.  

I was wanting to turn more than once, but since the simple turn is an “unwind,” my right foot was ending up off the floor and in front of my left, which made it difficult to continue turning.  At first, I just tried to bully my way through that, but, of course, that didn’t work.  It only made me unsteady and out-of-control.  Then I realized I merely had to pick up my right foot to keep turning.  That worked.

In addition to actually looking where I wanted to end up, I had to get out of my own way.

I find that this is a good idea for me in my life.

I need to be clear about where I want to land, but also get out of my own way and stop tripping over myself.  

I can’t bully myself to do something that feels wrong.  I can try, but I’ll end up being out-of-control and dizzy.

This means I must cultivate a strong core of trust.

With a strong core, I can go where my vision takes me.  

I can relax, do my dance, and trust life to unwind in the way it’s meant to.

I know that’s easier said than done.  

So I remind myself daily (sometimes hourly) that it’s safe to trust and to just get out of the way.

Rhythms

My husband was helping me choreograph a wedding dance for a friend’s wedding.  The choreography had to be fun, but easy, too.  I turned on the music and I showed my husband what I was thinking of teaching the bridal couple.  Suddenly, he said, “You’re not on the beat!”

“What!!??

Huh!

 

What do you mean I’m not on the beat??!!  I am always on the beat!  It is my JOB to be on the beat.  No –it’s my life to be on the beat!!!!”

I really was kidding, but what he said was true – for him.  

He had been tapping out his own beat to the song – one that I didn’t at first hear.  But when I really concentrated on it – there it was.  I could see my husband had a point.

We all hear the rhythm in different ways.  We focus on separate threads in a piece of music and we choose which rhythm or melody we hear.

In life, we all have our own ways of being, our own ways of seeing people, relationships, and events.  We choose what part of each of these we pay attention to.  No one is wrong.

All these disparate harmonies and beats magically come together to make one beautiful song.  

All of us, despite our differences, somehow harmonize as our lives flow onward -- even if there is, inevitably, a jarring note or two….or three.

We hear our own drum, we dance to our own beat, and hopefully we can remember to appreciate the rhythms of others. 

It’s all part of the same symphony.

Which Melody, Which Voice?

When choreographing a song, choices have to be made.  Am I going to pay attention to the accents of the percussion, or am I going to ignore them?  Am I going to do something different with the bridge or am I going to just continue with the same choreography?  Shall I use the saxophone in the harmonies or ignore it and use the melodies that are more in the forefront?  Should I use the words to inform my movement, or should I focus on the basic melody?

These questions make me think of all the voices I have going on in my head – especially the one that cries, “What-do-you-think-you’re-doing-you’re-not-good-enough-just-hide!”  I recognize this voice, it is my old friend.  This was the voice that made me keep my head down and escape difficult childhood situations.  It really protected me.

However, listening to that voice now is no longer a safe choice.  It is unhealthy in my life as an adult to swallow my emotions just to make others feel okay. 

I know the more I try to push this voice away from me, the louder it becomes.

So I hear this voice and I choose to not believe it.  I try to love it and say, “Thank you for protecting me when I was little.  Now you can relax.  I am going to take care of you now.” 

So I embrace that voice.  It worked hard and now deserves a joyful retirement.

My life is determined by which voice I listen to.  

The voice I listen to now is the one that nurtures me.

It says, “You are safe.  You are loved.  You are on earth to be joyful and loving and to share your gifts.”

And that goes for everyone.

When I get confused by different voices in my head, I ask myself, “What would love do?”

Which voice do you listen to?  Which melody will you make real?

What would love do?

Balance

When you learn to balance, you have to take a few tumbles before you understand what muscles you have to contract, and what you have to lengthen to stay balanced.  No one can teach you to balance, really.  Someone can tell you to keep your knee soft, tighten your abdominals, and focus your eyes on a specific point, but then you have to go it alone, even when you’re sure you’ll wipe out. 

Making mistakes is how we learn.  Some parts of balancing are intuitive, others are conscious.  You just have to feel it.  Sometimes we have to allow ourselves to fail before we know how to do it right.  And we have to allow others to fall down and understand that they are just trying – as we all are.

I have fallen down in front of a class.  You get to a point while falling where you know you can’t save yourself and you just resign yourself to going down.  If you let yourself relax during the fall, your chances of hurting yourself are minimized.  

At the point where you’re falling, if you try and resist it, that’s when you can really get hurt.  You are contracting your muscles to tense for the fall and it will hurt more when you finally land.

In life, we sometimes just have to go with what our intuition is telling us.  If we resist too much, we can end up, figuratively, hurt and on our butts.  If we can go with the flow, when we know there’s nothing else we can do -- even when it’s scary – we can somehow find our way to balance.

This is all part of trusting what we feel and trusting who we are.  If you trust yourself, you are not afraid to fall and make a mistake.  If you trust yourself, you know you will find your balance eventually.

I’ve had situations in my life when I was totally off-balance.  I knew, in the deepest part of myself, what I had to do to become happy again.  I hesitated because I knew that some people around me would not approve and would, in fact, be very angry.  These people loved me, but they had an investment in me showing up as I always had.

I had to remind myself that I am not a mean person, I would never purposely hurt another and I had every right to joy.  

I had to fall a couple of times, but I knew what I had to do to regain my balance.

Trust yourself.  You know what’s best for you.

You can always find your balance.